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I'm Sorry for Disappearing

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I feel so bad for not writing for a week, I really do. An update on my life is that I stopped taking my meds because I got up to 280+ pounds. I was dieting, excercising, and counting calories and I was still gaining 10+ pounds a week. I would look in the mirror and cry. Sometimes I'd just want to lay in bed all day because nothing I did was good enought o lose weight. Nothing. When I went on dates, my dates would bring up my weight gain. Every single time. I acknowledge that they were assholes but I also acknowledge that something MUST be done before I am 300 pounds. So, I stopped taking my meds about two weeks ago and I've lost weight naturally. I am not much on a diet, but I do watch what I eat. I haven't excercised much because of my knee being sore, but I still managed to lose weight. I do believe the weight might've been water retention or inflammation, but as long as I'm not 280 pounds. The lowest weight I was was 150 pounds and that was fine with me. On anot...

Running

I don't think I went into deep details about what happened when I started working out, mostly cardio. But I hurt myself so bad!! Like really bad, I got runner's knee and I've been recovering for about two weeks now. And I lost a TOENAIL! I am so embarrassed about losing a toenail, I feel so silly. I started running alot (6 days a week, 2 hours a day) and I put my body through so much stress. I was hurt to the point that I couldn't walk comfortably and I was limping really bad. There were moments that I literally felt like I needed a walker or crutches, but I was determined that I'd get much better. So, it is much better and I can move around better now. I don't walk with a limp as much, but it's still a bit sore. As for my toenail... I was running and the toe nail was hitting against my shoe alot. My toe nails aren't really that long and I try to keep them done, but it was alot of pressure from running. I had blisters on my feet etc. It was just over the...

UK

I'm not sure if I posted about my nomination to study in the UK, but I'm kind of excited about it. I was nominated to study in the United Kingdom at University of Birmingham. I am very anxious about it in so many ways. I will be far away from "home" and I can't bring my cat which is so heartbreaking to me. My cat is my everything. She has helped me go through so many things and she's always by my side, never leaving and never judging me. So, I'm excited to go but I believe it won't be easy easy. But I think it is worth it. So far, I am eligible to graduate with my Bachelor's as a Summa Cuma Laude student, if I keep up my a's in all my classes. Like I posted before, those midterms took a toll on me seriously. I was a bit overwhelmed, but midterms are mostly over (I thought they were done, but my theatre teacher posted a midterm today). So, once I finish that midterm, I will officially be done with midterms. I believe I have about 4-5 more weeks ...

Midterms Kept Me Busy

I'm so sad that I haven't been posting!! I promised myself I was going to post at least twice a day (minimum) and haven't posted in like a week or more time. Since then, although, this blog has grown alot with gaining worldwide attention. I found that to be surprising, as I always do. Especially considering that I disappeared. Midterms were alot... It was very writing intensive, and most days I didn't have alot of energy. BUT I completed my midterms and I am still on track to graduate with my Bachelors Summa Cum Laude (praying I remain getting good grades). I keep saying that I'm going to write another book and the only progress I've made was writing my name. I don't have a title, I'm not quite entirely sure what to say, and don't have any idea on the cover art. I just pray that it'll all come together one day. I am so disturbed because I injured myself while running really bad. Not only that, but I lost a toenail. I am so embarrassed and sad hon...

always trying with my hair

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photoshoot today :)

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My little joy

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