How Much I Love My Twin Brother

I love my big brother so so much. He was my favorite person in the world and I never thought that I'd have to be without him. I never thought I'd survive without him, but here I am. I have come to the point in my healing where I've realized he's not coming back. And you know, I'm ok with that. I'm ok with him not being here because he had such a hard life. A life filled with suffering, hardships, incest, extreme abuse, and tough times. I am so proud of how he overcame everything in his life and I know he's in a better place :) I no longer am so angry. I no longer cry tears of sadness, but I cry different tears these times. I cry because he's finally free. Free of all the severe abuse that he endured throughout his whole life. A weight has been lifted off my shoulders and I no longer ask God "Why?" No reason to question God. I will never love anyone as much as I loved my brother because he was so unique. Someone that didn't bother anyone and always did the right thing. In this world that we live in, that's so hard to find. That's why I loved him so much... He was so rare. He was there when I needed him the most as I was for him. He was there when I had nobody and needed someone (anyone). As I wake up every morning due to the grace of God/Allah, I am thankful for the life that I have lived. I don't live an easy or privileged life in any way, but I have life. Despite what I've been through in life and seen, I love my life. I wouldn't trade spots with anyone. I will continue to move forward and be sweet as I can be.