There's times where I don't think about my brother being murdered and I'm grateful for the few moments where I don't obsess over what happened to my twin brother. Sometimes when I think about losing Sidney, I can't eat, sleep, think, walk, talk. I can't do anything. It's like I'm paralyzed. I used to be so ANGRY about what happened to him. Now I feel a heap of peace knowing that he's in a better place. I know that my brother is an angel and he was/is so precious to me. All of our memories mean so much to me. It was always Sidney and Nicole. Every day. EVery moment. I used to feel so hopeless without him, because I didn't see any hope for my life. Now I live knowing that I do have a purpose and it will be fulfilled on this earth. And once that purpose is filled, I too, will be in a better place.
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