I've definitely had days where I felt like "I'm better off dead" "Nobody cares" "My life is a waste" Those days are the hardest to get through because humiliating and disappointing moments keep swirling through my mind. All the ways I've been betrayed, all the lies, all the hurt.. They replay in my mind. It is so difficult living with 6+ mental illnesses in a world that can care less. When I got out the psych ward, the only thing that would calm me down is my bible. It's the only thing I can hang on to. The only thing that gives me hope, in a world where I have nothing. These days I have to pray twice a day to relieve my soul of suffering. Ever since my trip to Atlanta, I have felt so low. So sad. So hopeless. I'm still picking up the pieces that my family shattered in my life and it is not an easy feat. But prayer has helped me get through it. I want to fast along with my prayers tk get some clarity but I don't feel safe doing so because of my meds.
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